Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Divorce - The Checklist

What to do when you are about to get divorced:

- Get a wild animal; not a dog, not a cat, not a fish. Maybe a snake, an iguana or a bat
- Change radically your haircut
- Buy clothes one generation ahead of you
- Get drunk twice a week (or more if you can handle it)
- Practice unsafe sex
- Become a TV sports maniac and subscribe all the paid channels you can imagine
- Same goes for porno
- Book vacations on places where you know things will happen (Ibiza, Amsterdam, etc..)
- If your boss asks anything just say you are getting divorced with that stupid face people expect you to do
- Buy a motorcycle
- If you really need a girlfriend, get a foreign one
- Know by heart all the places in town where quality whisky is cheap
- Get a second cell phone (if you're getting divorced you probably have one already)
- Make a divorce party that will make at least three of your friends to file divorce as well
- If someone asks you your civil status, just say the one that suits most the occasion
- Listen to annoying, repetitive music

While this list might appear as a very "I don't give a damn" list, this is the way people will see you as a divorced person. Even if you don't practice any of the ideas here displayed. So.. Just do it!

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Urban Fairy Tales - The Gambler

Once upon a time I met a Gambler. He was tall and handsome, just like those fancy, high-class suit individuals you see in the movies. Like any other gambler, he didn't miss a thing on his stereotype rendez-vous style. A genuine smile. Those smiles anyone can give another one back. It's impossible not to. And he knew he had that smile. Any girl would ever in any situation not smile to that pretty, charming and dazzling Gambler. You couldn't find a single piece of his hair out of place. A little white tissue would come out inches perfectly out of the pocket of his jacket. Could a girl ask for more?

It was a Saturday night. I was bored and lonely and decided to go out to do something. I remember I started driving randomly as I had no idea what to do whatsoever. The casino was just on the other side of the road. Why not? It's been years since I had go there the last time. I started with the traditional slot machines but got stuffed with it after five boring minutes. An old lady right next to me kept mumbling and whining about the fact that her machine was not giving her what was supposed to. Like if there was any science behind it. Anyways, it was just five minutes since I got in and I hadn't spent almost nothing so I decided to give a walk around. And then I saw him.

The game he was playing was some sort of horses race, where little plastic horses would go round one lap in a oval circuit, just like those you see in real life. You would bet an amount of chips in one horse, depending I suppose, on some information the little screen you had in front of you would give you on the horses. He was right in front of me. I could have positioned myself differently but I assume I wanted to stay right in front of him. His smile was in fact contagious. Like an hypnotic thing. You couldn't stop staring. I started to look to the persons he was looking at. The croupier and some other gentleman who was there. Apparently they knew each other from that horses table. The croupier was a woman in her 30's. She was like me, absolutely melted with all his charming attitude. And the moment came.

He finally looked me in the eyes. It looked like the ten most long seconds of my entire life. I looked at him for like four of five times and I thought he didn't noticed. But when he finally looked, I was damn sure he knew it. He definitely knew I looked at him before. After those ten seconds he left his seat and started to walk towards me. Well, I was not a teenager anymore to tremble in front of a man, so I gathered myself up really fast and pretended that was nothing with me, regardless the fact I knew he was about to do something. I'm sorry, he said. I did that face everyone does that says "Are you talking to me?" I believe your horse has just won the race. You have to click that button the get the prize, said the Gambler with that killing smile again. I looked at the little screen and yes, my horse had won the race. "Thank you" said I with a bit of shame. After all, I was trying to play the hard to get girl and he caught me just on the corner. Since it was my first time winning that game, I got a bit confused on which button I should hit to get my reward. "May I?" said the Gambler, now with a nurturing gaze. I didn't said a word. He clicked a button and a little receipt came out with my prize money. "I can see you have been here a lot lately." I said, "Not really, it's my first time." He replied: "Well, what a surprise. By the way you looked at me when I approached you, it seemed you had it all figured out." I decided to smile at this point. "Would you please take me to the place where I am supposed to go to get this prize money?" But of course, he said as he picked my arm to start walking with him.

And from here, there's not much to tell you about. We were both adults, both attractive, there isn't much to think about right? Well, not exactly. Everything went right till we got to my place. I offered him a drink, he accepted and we started talking again. At some point he asked me: "What's your biggest fear?" I stopped five seconds to think it over as it was something I never really thought about. I answered him I had never thought about it thoroughly, so I couldn't give him an answer right away. He leaned back and said: "Well, living with fear is what puts me everyday on the table. You know why?" I said no. "To find fear you need to find courage." After saying that, he left my place and said good night.

And I never saw that Gambler again. Forever and ever.


Sunday, June 16, 2013

The Unconnected Society

Today's technology companies all advertise the same. That with their products and services they are bringing us all together and that we are eventually more happy, since we can keep track of what is going on in the lives of those we care about. Is it?

I don't think so. I believe there wasn't obviously any concertated plan to turn our daily routines into some sort of hybrid cyborg living. This is just companies doing what they do best, that is, money. Nothing against that, I try to do it myself. The thing here is, we have accepted that what I call, "The Unconnected Society", is now a living standard and we are okay with it.

If you give it a closer look, you can easily see that everything these days is designed in a way you don't have to move yourself. In a way you don't need to leave the doorstep to see things. To see people. To interact. See how the word interact today has a conotation much more related to technology than with human relations. You interact with an iPad or an iPhone, you don't interact with your mother right? Speaking of your mother, try to remember how many times you say "I phoned my mother today" in instance of "I was with my mother today". I assume the phone calls, texts or emails are in bigger number than the physical presences. Same goes for friends and acquaintances. You may argue it's lack of time, since your life is so busy, and I can accept that argument to some extent, but from what I see from the less busy people, the behaviour is very similar.

Today, I can simply turn on my tablet and use Google to travel the world as I wish. Same goes to see artwork and museums. Download a movie. See the news. Check what my friends did last night. Find out my sister in law has a cat. Skype a friend and talk about life.

My question is: isn't much more fun to actually travel instead of google mapping for an hour (travelling got inexpensive these days in case your computer didn't tell you about it)? Isn't it more fun to actually go to a real museum or art gallery? Isn't it more fun to actually go to the cinema? Isn't it more fun to go out with with your friends instead of seeing on Facebook what happened last night? And finally, tell me honestly, it is more fun to have real sex than Skype sex right? :-)

I have nothing against technology as I use it myself, but I believe it is important to be aware that rapidly we are taking steps to keep ourselves more and more distant from those who we really care about, with the false feeling that we are closer.

We need technology as we always did, but we don't need a machine to experience feelings such as love or friendship. For that, we just need to hit the shut down button more often. I'm doing it now and go kiss my girlfriend. For real. :-)

Friday, May 17, 2013

Yeah!

We are still alive! Hang in there!

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Amsterdam

Amsterdam. The vibrant, cold and enthusiastic city of the Netherlands. To be honest I am still absorbing much of what's happening here, even though, I promised friends I would write something about it, so here it goes.

It is a bit hard to describe Amsterdam. From the tourist point of view it resumes itself to a very dynamic, beautiful and pretty much, crazy city. It's the place where you can get anywhere with a simple bycicle, where you can smoke weed or axe just like that or even go to a prostitute without having anyone looking at you like if you are an alien. Like a friend says, it really is like going to a pharmacy and get a pain killer. Simple as that.

But it's much more than that. It is a city that goes beyond the beautiful adjective. Every neighbourhood has its   special thing, every corner has a new story to tell, every street has a special moment and every place is the new place to be.

What about people? Well, that's another thing that makes things so special. In Amsterdam you can find literally, people from all over the world. Living, working, studying, partying, wondering and the verbs could go on and on. At the same time, this massive group of people are almost all in some sort of transitory state. You talk with them, and they all have some plan: going to Berlin, Stockholm, Paris, New York, who knows. And most likely, you wont hear about those persons ever again. So I would say it's some sort of transitory city. I think it's really not the best place for you to discover yourself, as you get so moved by the city itself, it gets harder and harder at some point to define what you want for your life.

And all this dynamism and uncertainty gets mixed with the dutch lifestyle somehow: analytical, calculated, soft paced and at the same time with a strong will to thrive and succeed. Amsterdam is actually a though city. Everyone wants to stay here. I have met many people that come here just on vacations and decide to stay and try their luck. Some stay, some go. Knew recently two italian fellows who came here for a weekend and live here for two and a half years. Still living both on the same hostel they booked for the weekend and both working as bycicle mail deliverers for a private company. Not enough to get rich, but enough to party and eat.

But lets get to some more examples: the austrian 40 years old guy, ex heroin addict who lives in Amsterdam, actually, who doesnt have a place to live has he sleep in the streets, and spends all his nights till 3am in a bar so that way he wont spend the whole night out. The portuguese guy who came here for just six months of work, and lives here now for eight years, married with a dutch girl and two daughters. The turkish cab guy that can speak six languages fluently has he worked has a cab driver in five different countries already. The prostitute that came from Bulgaria, got rich in 3 years and now has five hairsaloon's in Amsterdam. And I could keep going, has in Amsterdam, everyone has a story to tell.

In the middle of all this, the crime rate is one of the lowest in Europe. Why? For some reason and it is something you feel if you live here, you know if you get out of the line, sooner or later, they will get you. This is the country where you get a 41 euros fine for not using lights while riding your bike at night. Or for riding your bike out of the bikepad. There are more little examples. In other countries this sort of behaviour would also be a motive for a fine, difference is here, you will get fined, period. There is no bullshit talk with the police to see if this time the thing flies. It will fly money out of your pocket, and that is it.

So, it is interesting the kind of balance they have achieved here, as in a way, you are legally authorised to do things that you cannot do in other countries, but at the same time, you get the feeling you need to behave properly. Or else.

All in all, it is an absolutely stunning city, where you get to know the most interesting people, the most interesting places, the wildest parties, the must go events and eventually, what you're looking for. Who knows? It's Amsterdam!

Hope to see you soon here. Tot later!

Monday, November 5, 2012

Drug use battle will never get into a war

So, as you can see, this is the end for crack use. Or so they say. This picture is part of an advertising campaign where in multiple pics like this one, you see people on the end of the line of drug abuse. The creative part of it is that the ad is like an image in the end of a movie. Not a big hit on originality in my opinion, but thats not the point here.

Governments of any developed country have an ongoing war on drugs, which is something to expect. Drug abuse usually lead to what the picture shows. But the question here is, when someone starts doing drugs can they imagine themselves in such a horrible situation, sleeping in the street, having to steal things or sell their own body to buy the next fix?

Awnser is no. No one can picture itself on such a situation. Seeing the other side of the coin is like a guy whos working on a kitchen restaurant imagining himself having a worldwide restaurant chain. But wait.. actually there are some people who start out in the kitchen and end up being CEOs. So its ok to think that someone who starts with a joint might end up in crack. But like I said no one thinks this way, at least in this degenerative way.

So whats the solution? Im not a psychology expert myself but Ill risk a solution. What about starting with the light drugs? I know there are programs already going on with light drugs but most of the investment goes to the heavy ones. Also it would be important to understand that drug use matches a lifestyle. It is normal for someone who usually smokes weed or ashe to hang around in places where you can do it safely. Chemichal drugs, like ecstasy, are popular among eletronic music lovers. Cocain is more hard to stereotype because everyone is doing it these days regardless the lifestyle.

What I mean is.. If you manage to explain people there are alternatives to those lifestyles that are as cool as the weed or ecstasy use lifestyle, eventually, people will start to choose another path. And now youre thinking, but how can weed or ecstasy lifestyle be a cool thing? In the moment it is, and that is the main issue.